Journal Entry - The Fucks a Stardate !?

Posted on Mon Mar 23rd, 2026 @ 1:23am by Josef Forstinger

478 words; about a 2 minute read

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Alright. Guess I'm back to doing this. Didn't wanna keep writing in my Journal of fear it actually just disintegrates-though it's in pretty good shape. And after messing about and NOT asking Tenzi for any help, I figured out how to access these "Personal Logs"-Jesus, everything's gotta have a fancy name nowadays, huh? And now I sound like my grandfather, great.

Okay. Turns out I've been frozen for the past 500 years, Aliens are real, I'm on a damned spaceship, god knows how far away from Earth, and everyone I've known, loved, hated, or just even seen is dead and gone.

Also, when I woke up, I attacked that "Away Team" and nearly killed several people, so what a great introduction. But, they've been kind so far. Hell, I even fucked up at that Political Convention, and they haven't thrown me overboard-yet.

I even made some friends-I think. Like Tenzi, Counselor Leilani (though I guess that's also her Job), that Bartender Guy- but, fuck. okay.

I don't know how to put this without sounding completely insane. Maybe I am. Hell, if anyone ever reads this besides me, I probably WILL ACTUALLY get thrown overboard.

Nothing feels real. Not like...back then. I can't explain it. One second I look at an Alien, know it's an Alien, then I forget, and it's like a human in makeup. Or, my guys. Alex, Otto, Karl-all of them. I see them. Theyre Dead. But I see them in my dreams. Not all the time, only when there's a lot of stress. Same with memories-I guess flashbacks, what they're called.

Fine, I admit it. Im scared. Scared of all this shit. I feel like a helpless idiot who cant even do things expected of a preteen without assistance. I feel like im being watched, laughed at, pitied-and I cant explain it. I like them, I like her, but my minds ringing bells like it's Sunday.

Scared of going home. Ironic. I fought for my family, my friends, and now, theyre all gone. Do I even have a home anymore ? I dont know what ill do when I get back to Earth, or even if.

Im starting to lose it. Why am I even writing all of this shit down ? Not like anyones actually gonna read it. And If they do ill just get thrown into a padded cell-or appereantly thjey dont DO that anymore, but I'm not sure I trust that seeing as when those vulcans threw me into some fucking force cell or whatever and left me there and the others for hours on end for just trying to help those idiotic robitic elf looking fucks

okay screw this idiotic writing feelings bullshit
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Tags: Personal Log

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